Covid made me confront racial trauma

The year of 2020 marks the start of a global pandemic and the year which saw more black lives innocently taken through police brutality and racism. For me personally, it will also be the year that I finally confronted my painful past with racism and how that has shaped and affected me today.

It is no coincidence that 2020 also saw, thankfully, the rise of more mental health charities for black and mixed-race people. It was a result of this that gave me the chance to learn more about racial trauma, which inspired me to then speak to others in more detail about their experiences. Along the way I had the opportunity to speak to experts in racial trauma and all of this can be read in my latest feature for Black Ballad.

Black Ballad: Beyond Survival: Racial Trauma, Radical Self-Care & Our Healing As Resistance

Content warning: this article includes experiences of racist harassment, mention of suicide and self-harm.

I hope readers who have experienced racial trauma can find comfort in the stories shared and are able to take on the practical advice given from the incredible therapists who feature in this piece. I also hope that those who call themselves an ally, can gain an insight into how racism can affect ones mental and physical wellbeing.

Thank you for reading,
Chloe x

This year I set myself a couple of New Year’s resolutions. Some I broke quite quickly and others I’m continuing to practice, one of which includes being ‘body positive’. If you’re wondering what, why and how, then read on.

“It’s a sign from a greater power!”
While browsing through my ‘recommendations’ on ASOS, a bright pink book appeared and on the front was a girl with a big smile and amazingly colourful hair. Seeing this picture instantly cheered me up and so I was intrigued to find out what it was exactly.

Body Positive Power by Megan Jayne Crabbe aka @bodyposipanda
When I enlarged the photo I was sucked in by the tagline “How to stop dieting, make peace with your body and live”. Some may say discovering this book was just down to a very clever shopping algorithm, but I say it was a sign from a greater power telling me to snap out of my body shaming ways!

Megan Jayne Crabbe bravely shares her own body image issues which led to anorexia and – during her years of ‘recovery’ – episodes of binge eating and yo yo dieting; until she found body positivity. She tells readers how she’s finally escaped the ‘cult of thin’ and details what the body positive movement means.

I bought the book as an early Christmas present to myself, but have only been reading it since the New Year. A few chapters in and I have felt liberated, a desire to wear the clothes i’ve been telling myself I’ll buy when I drop 3 dress sizes and an urge to dye my hair pink! I’ve not done the last one yet but these pages have been touching, emotional, inspiring and challenging.

If this was a complete book review, i’d say BRILLIANT, 5 STARS!
I’ve not finished reading Megan’s book, so this isn’t a complete book review, but it has made me think very differently towards diet, exercise and my past weight loss experiences. All of which has left me feeling motivated to beat my obsession with being ‘thin’ and the constant guilt I have when eating.

Instead, I’d love to learn/ re-learn (because i’m genuinely interested in it) more about good nutrition and healthy eating. In the meantime, I’ll work on accepting what i’ve got and enjoying everything else around me; because I’ve spent far too many years overthinking and stressing about food and my weight. That said, I’ll still be blogging about it for many years to come!

One step at a time eh!

Thanks for reading,
Chloe x

Treats & Treadmills

Category: Mind

Being body positive